Saturday, November 8, 2008

Handwriting Analysis

It has been a while since I last did an event for Handwriting Analysis (known as Graphology for some). Today I did an event in Sentosa for Kaybee Group and I saw some very interesting characters over there. The most interesting person I came across was the Finance Director. Right after he wrote his name and some statement and signed his name, I was able to tell (from his very detailed and clear handwriting) that he must be a finance person. Due to his very meticulous personality, he is very well suited for the job.
Many people always wonder if handwriting really reveals so much about their personality. The truth is, on a non influenced situation, what you write really reveals who you are. Each stroke in terms of the angle, the strength, the placement in relative to other characters tells very minute detail about a person. Handwriting reveals a lot about how a person work and how they manage their task. A signature reveals a lot about a person's inner self and how they want to be treated. A simple thing to do is to compare the size of a signature with the handwriting. When the signature is smaller than the handwriting, then this person is not very confident and wants to stay within the background within a group. When the signature is a lot bigger than the handwriting, then this person is more confident and wants to stay at the front of a group. Of course, there are many other factors to consider when analysing a handwriting. But these guidelines that I have just stated are some very simple methods that are often very accurate.

There was once a client of mine requested me to do a detailed analysis of her handwriting. After the analysis, she wanted me to guide her on how to change her signature and handwriting. Her logic was that by changing her handwriting, she hope that she will be able to change her personality. I was actually very amused by her thought. The truth is, it is more effective to change a personality by directly willing to change and taking steps to change. By changing your handwriting, you may not change your personality. By changing your handwriting, you will only learn how to mask your personality via the way you write. No doubt, the change of handwriting may affect your behaviours some way or other, however in comparison, it is definitely more effective to change your personality by directly willing yourself to change than simply changing your handwriting.
Life is full of surprises and for each handwriting I read, there is always a story behind. It is like watching a new movie everytime when I read someone's life or handwriting. I guess these surprises are what generate so much passion in me towards my work.


Sunday, November 2, 2008

Did I marry the right person

Read this from an email and tried to trace the source but not able to find the author in order to give credits to this wonderful article. So I'll just post this and hope that it'll help someone in the way they look at their marriage.

This is a very good article. Those who are still single may learn something from here....
Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your marriage & relationship ...

During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, 'How do I know if I married the right person?'

I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, 'It depends. Is that your husband?'
In all seriousness, she answered 'How do you know?'
Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.Here's the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse/partner. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit). Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience.

You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called 'falling' in love... Because it's happening TO YOU . People in love sometimes say, 'I was swept of my feet.' Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades.
It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.. At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, 'Did I marry the right person?'

And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else.

This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't 'find' LASTING love. You have to 'make' it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression 'the labor of love.' Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery.

There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships.Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable ... you can 'make' love.

Love in marriage is indeed a 'decision'... Not just a feeling.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Why are we afraid of someone?

Recently, I came across a case where a father was having problem in managing his son. His son decided not to go to school and stayed at home playing computer games. For a 15 year old, playing computer game may sound like a normal thing to do. But in this case, he is using playing computer game as a way of passing his time and he is showing his unhappiness about the school by refusing to go to school. The relationship between the father and the son has gotten to a stage where the father is totally out of his wits on how to get his son to go to school to study.
A few things have to be straighten out before I continue with the story. First of all, the son is not a typical defiant child who does not study well or join the wrong crowd in school. By analyzing his birth chart, I realised that he is actually a very smart child who used to have very good grades in school.
From this case, it prompted me to think about how can this father and son relationship developed into what it is today.
In general, be it in office or at home, we seemed to obey to the following rule:
Who ever that is able to carry out his threat will be the one who controls the reaction of others.

In a family, most of the time, parents tend to pose threats to their children. This behaviour seems to be very common in our Singapore culture. When a parent or guardian is trying to stop a child from behaving in certain ways, like stopping a child from walking further from them, they will tell them small threats in hope that the child will be afraid of the threat and stop the unwanted behaviour (it can simple threat like, the policeman will come to catch you if you run further).
Though these threats seems very harmless from the surface, little do the parent know that when a threat is posed and when the behaviour do not stop, and the threat is not being fulfilled, the parent is actually conditioning their children that their threats are not going to come true.
You may want to ask yourself, out of 10 threats that you posed towards your child, how many times do you actually execute those threats when your child really go against your will? If your reply is more than 8, then you will very likely find that your child do listen to your instructions or usually behave in the way you want them to. If your reply is between 5-7, then you may still be able to manage your child’s behaviour every now and then. If your answer is less than 5, then you will need to really re-think how you can establish your credibility with your child in terms of executing your threats towards them.
Then what exactly is a threat? A threat is anything that you say that you will do if your child does not change the undesired behaviour. For example, when your child plays at an escalator, you may see that it is dangerous for them to behave in that way, thus you may threaten that you will call the security personnel to lecture them if he does not stop playing immediately. Then if he continues to play at the escalator, and all you did was to drag him out of the escalator, then you are not fulfilling your threat at all. What you just did will get him out of any harm, but it will also condition him that your threat is never real. The correct response that you should be having is to really go and get a security personnel to lecture your child. The rule is simple, if you cannot or will not perform that threat, then do not pose that threat to your child.
In fact, using threat as a tactic to discipline your child is not really a good way of educating them. The correct form of educating your child is to really let them understand the actual reason why you really want him to stop his behaviour. Using the escalator as an example, you may explain to your child that playing at the escalator is a dangerous thing to do and he may get his hand or feet trapped in between the mechanism. You can also highlight that playing at the escalator is also a very inconsiderate thing to do as he will cause obstruction to other users. More over, the machine was designed and built as a transporting tool, not as a toy to play with. Thus by highlighting all these logical reasons to them, you direct him to his social responsibility and logical mind that not all things are meant for fun and laughter as the way he perceives it.
In a work environment, there is a constant threat on most people and that is that if they do anything wrong, they may just lose their job. This threat is the reason why so many people put up with unreasonable bosses, or unreasonable clients. Though it may not be implicitly spelled to you, it is a fact that you can not deny. Threat is actually not the best motivator for a desired result. In fact, it can be counter productive most of the time. People will start to develop all sorts of defense mechanism and at times resentment towards the source of the threat.
To continue with my story, the young boy has developed so much control over the parents that none of them can actually discipline him anymore. In the end, I recommended them to seek professional help from the Family Service Centres where the parents and the child can go through a program in better managing their relationship.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Is there such a thing as "One date fits all" for Wedding dates?

One of the common misconception about auspicious wedding date is that as long as the almanac or chinese calendar states that it is a good date for wedding, then it will be an auspicious date for everyone to get married.

On the contrary, it may just be a very bad date for yourself! There are many ways to select an auspicious wedding date. Referring to the chinese almanac and the chinese calendar are two of the most common methods. However, many people who does the wedding date selection are not aware that besides the direct clashes of the birth animal of the bride and groom, there are some other form of indirect clashes that we have to take into consideration in order to ensure that the date is really auspicious for the couple and the major stake holders. There are several types of these clashes:

6 Direct Clashes (Liu4 Chong1, 六冲)
Persecuting Clashes (Xing2, 刑)
6 Harm (Hai4, 害)
Destruction (Po4, 破)

Besides the birth year, there should not be any clashes between the date selected and the BaZi (Four Pillar) of the couple. Thus knowledge on Four Pillar Analysis will be essential in order to ensure that the date selected is actually auspicious.

On top of the above factors, there are certain dates which are not suitable for wedding ceremony even if the almanac states that it is an auspicious date. For example, when the date happens to fall on a change of season or change of solstice, then the energy for that day may not be very pure and clear. Thus doing any major event may not be able to harness the auspicious energy.

These are all very important elements for consideration for an auspicious wedding date. When selected wrongly, it may affect the couple in many ways like conflicts and fertility issues. No doubt many people would like to DIY for date selection but unless you know what exactly you are doing, DIY may not be the most wise option.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Palm Reading, Feng Shui, Four Pillar Analysis: Auspicious wedding date selection

Palm Reading, Feng Shui, Four Pillar Analysis: Auspicious wedding date selection

Auspicious wedding date selection

I have been asked many times about the dos and don'ts of wedding dates selection. Thus I have decided to write additional info on the FAQ for auspicious wedding dates selection for those young new couples who are intending to get married in the coming years.

Basically, most people wonder why they should choose an auspicious date and why some fortune tellers cannot select wedding dates beyond a certain dates. All these questions are being answered in my auspicious date selection section. See below:

Horizontal lines on the fingers (strong ones)

I tend to see that some people have strong horizontal lines on their fingers or even thumb. I am talking about strong horizontal lines and not those small horizontal lines. Usually you will see only one or two in the sections of the fingers. Not everyone has it though. These lines are actually some form or obstacles towards the meaning qualities of that fingers. For example, when it is found on the tip of the last finger, then we can say that the owner has some hinderances towards their own communication abilities. If found on the tip of the thumb, then it is a hindrance towards one's will power. Below is another link that has some info about horizontal lines. You may want to check it out.